Actual Church Signs
- Church Parking - For Members Only! Trespassers
will be baptized!
- "No God - No Peace. Know God - Know Peace."
- "Free Trip to Heaven. Details Inside!"
- "Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins."
- An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, -"For Fast Relief, Take Two Tablets."
- "People are like tea bags - you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are."
- "Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush."
- "Fight truth decay - study the Bible daily."
- "Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives."
- "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world."
- "It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin."
- "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns."
- "If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again."
- "Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire Insurance soon."
- "A ch__ch is a church when (U R) in it.
- "In the dark? Follow the Son."
- "Running low on faith? Stop in for a fill-up."
- "God only accepts knee-mail."
Related Reading:
Broken on the back row
Experience love and forgiveness
Need advice? Ask us.

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