How to Tell if You're Over the Hill
by unknown- You no longer laugh at 'Preparation H' commercials.
- Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.
- You buy shoes with crepe rubber soles.
- The only reason you're still awake at 2 am is indigestion.
- People ask you what color your hair used to be.
- You enjoy watching the news.
- Your car must have four doors.
- You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
- You dream about prunes.
- You browse the bran cereal section in the grocery store.
- You start worrying when your supply of Ben Gay is low.
- You think a CD is a certificate of deposit.
- You have more than two pairs of glasses.
- You read the obituaries daily.
- Your biggest concern when dancing is falling.
- You enjoy hearing about other people’s operations.
- You wear black socks with sandals.
- You know all the warning signs of a heart attack.
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