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My husband and I were recently out to dinner with my best friend and her husband. My friend's husband made a joke that my husband took personally and my husband got angry at him. My friend's husband was embarrassed and cancelled our plans for the weekend. I told my husband that I thought he was wrong for treating a friend like that. Now he is not speaking to me. I don't want to lose my best friend, or alienate my husband.
Apologize to your friend and her husband and explain that the joke must have triggered a deep wound that your husband isn't prepared to talk about right now. See if your husband is willing to talk to a counselor about it, or let it go till he comes around. It is not about you or your friends, so at some point he will move past this. It was only a matter of time before this wound got triggered, so tell your friends it is not their fault. Sorry about the week-end. This is earth and this is life - it happens. If it happens a lot, you may want to use more force to get him to a counselor. Dr. Ginger
~Dr. Ginger Gabriel, Ph.D., M.F.T., is an author and speaker as well as a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California. With Master of Arts degrees in counseling and missions and a Ph.D. in psychology, she has traveled to Asia, the Middle East and throughout North American giving her four-to fifteen-hour relationship and counseling skill-building seminars.
Her favorite pastimes are kayaking, quilting, hiking and reading novels. She is married to Dr. Stan Gabriel. They have three children and three grandchildren.
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